


When Will the Stars Align?

by woakiees



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: F/M, Mutual Pining, Poe is a dumbass, and so oblivious
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-27
Updated: 2020-07-27
Packaged: 2021-03-06 05:15:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,610
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25557928
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/woakiees/pseuds/woakiees
Summary: “You wanted Poe to want you just as much as you wanted him, and you wanted him to put his hand on your thigh while he whispered into your ear, but he’d never look at you like he was looking at her.”
Relationships: Poe Dameron/Reader
Comments: 7
Kudos: 86





	When Will the Stars Align?

It couldn’t have been more obvious.

You were staring. You were staring so blatantly so and anyone who looked your way would immediately realize exactly what you were doing. And what made it even worse was the fact that they could simply follow your line of vision and know for certain that you were staring at _him_ , nonetheless.

It was so fucking obvious, and yet you couldn’t even find it within yourself to feel ashamed or embarrassed over it. It wasn’t like he had noticed for himself. Yet.

But even with the idea of being caught by him fluttering through your mind, you couldn’t tear your gaze away. If you didn’t know any better, you would say you were almost entranced by him, but you knew it was simply the alcohol coursing through your veins, making you just a little bolder, giving you just a little more courage.

Or maybe you really were entranced by him, because _Maker_ , you _couldn’t stop staring_.

It was absurd, how truly and undeniably handsome one man could be. Poe Dameron was so perfect, so breathtaking, so ethereal, and those words didn’t even do him any sort of justice. It didn’t make sense to you, how someone like him could exist — you would lay in bed night after night and try and wrap your head around it but you never could. He was truly something unparalleled, something nearly unfathomable.

And of course, you weren’t the only one who thought so, and that might’ve been why you really didn’t care if you were caught staring. Or maybe it was because Poe was your friend, and he wouldn’t think twice of it. No, if he caught you staring, he’d probably think you were just trying to gain his attention, and end up making his way over to your table and plop himself down into the chair across from you.

At least, that was what he _normally_ would’ve done.

Now you doubted he would even be able to feel your gaze on him, he was so preoccupied. You didn’t think he even knew that you were there, sitting in the cantina, watching him flirt with a random woman at the bar during a rare, brief moment of reprieve from the war.

He deserved it. Really, he did. Poe deserved every chance he could get his hands on to just be a normal human being, doing normal things without a threat looming overhead, and that included getting drunk and trying to pick up people at a bar.

Poe deserved it, more than anyone you thought, but that didn’t stop the jealousy from swirling deep in the pit of your stomach, creeping its way up into your veins, turning your blood into fire as it rushed through you. Your emotions — another absurd thing you could never truly comprehend. You shouldn’t have been jealous, he was only your friend.

But it should’ve been you. You wanted it to be you. You wanted Poe to want you just as much as you wanted him, and you wanted him to put his hand on _your_ thigh while he whispered into _your_ ear, but he’d never look at you like he was looking at her.

Just friends. Only ever friends.

You tried to remind yourself that that was fine. You’d made a silent vow to Poe so long ago that you’d be whatever he needed, whatever he wanted you to be whenever he needed you. It didn’t matter what he was in your life so long as he was in it, and as you sat there and stared and wallowed, you repeated that mantra to yourself over and over again, trying to push back your feelings and bury them like you had become so well practiced with.

But it wasn’t working this time, and again, you blamed the alcohol. If anything, the jealousy and the longing grew worse as you watched him laugh at something the woman had said. You wanted to be the reason behind every laugh of his, always.

Maybe if he would just _look at you_ , you could convince him that what he truly wanted was you, even if it was only for the night as you knew this girl would be.

But he was suddenly cut off from your line of vision, and you blinked several times to adjust your eyes, taking in the sight of Finn sliding into the seat across from you, a small scowl on his lips.

He was the only one who knew for certain your feelings for Poe, and you knew he didn’t approve of what you were doing to yourself just then.

Finn peeked over his shoulder, watching Poe for just a moment or two before settling his eyes back on you, gaze just a little softer than it had been before.

“You’re staring at him.”

You scoffed gently, shaking your head and leaning back in your seat, folding your arms across your chest as you forced yourself to continue looking at Finn and not let your eyes travel behind him. “Am not. I just _happened_ to look over and he just _happened_ to be there.”

“Oh yeah?” he hummed, mirroring your actions but adding a quirked eyebrow into the mix. “So why was that look on your face then?”

You tilted your head to the side, genuinely curious. Had you been glaring? Frowning? “What look?”

Finn shrugged his shoulders, seeming to be choosing his words carefully. “You just get this look in your eye when you’re around him. Like you’re staring up at the night sky or something.”

“And?”

He looked down at the table, shrugging again. “You love the stars.”

You were silent, for several long seconds, letting his words sink in, only repeating yourself when you did find your voice again. “And?”

“And you’re going to kill yourself if you continue to just sit here and stare at him.”

“He’s my friend, Finn.”

“Yeah,” he laughed, though the sound held no humor. “Your friend that you’re stupidly in love with.”

He wasn’t wrong.

“Again. And? He doesn’t love me like that and that’s fine. I’m happy for him.”

“No you’re not.”

“I have to be.” You were trying to be.

“So why are you sitting here making yourself miserable by watching him? That seems kind of counterproductive if you’re truly trying to be happy for him.”

You were silent again, trying to come up with an answer, some sort of reasoning, but really, you had no idea what you were doing. Why were you even there? You had no plans to drink, hadn’t been visiting with anyone until Finn came along. Were you really just at the cantina to watch him?

It was pathetic. You were pathetic. Your feelings were pathetic and you needed to get better at bottling them up again, at holding them back so that you didn’t accidentally ruin your friendship.

 _Friendship_. Nothing more, never anything more.

You hated yourself for questioning whether or not it was even worth it anymore.

Finn pulled you away from that thought though, reaching across the table and taking your hand, squeezing it just once.

“Sweetheart, you’re just going to hurt yourself if you stay here and watch him.”

You swallowed the lump rising in your throat, nodding your head slowly. “I know.”

“Come back to base with me. We can sit in your quarters and eat those sweets we bought on Coruscant and do whatever it is that girls do to get over jerky guys.”

You gave a small, genuine laugh at that, shaking your head gently. “There’s not going to be any getting over him, but I’m always down for some sweets.”

Finn and you both knew that as long as Poe played a part in your life, you’d never be over him. And again, you found yourself wondering if holding him close was worth your own heartache anymore. The thought made your chest squeeze even tighter, and you left it alone to deal with another day. Now wasn’t the time, not when you were already hurting. You couldn’t add to it, not then.

And so you stood, letting Finn lead you from the dirty cantina with his hand loosely in yours — a platonic gesture you appreciated to no end. It was comforting, and kept you from getting lost in the crowd.

And for some reason, it kept you from glancing towards Poe again.

But if you had, you would’ve found his eyes — his brown eyes that you loved so much full of a familiar jealousy and locked on you, watching you leave with another man. With Finn.

_Why did it have to be Finn?_

The woman sitting in front of him lost his interest completely as his mind started to race, his stomach swirling with emotions he usually kept trapped under lock and key, and all he could think about was chasing after you. He _should’ve_ chased after you, but he was completely frozen, unable to remember how to get his legs to work properly. He felt like he was going to be sick.

And so he merely sat there, not even noticing as the woman in front of him excused herself at his sudden lack in response. It didn’t matter, she didn’t matter to him.

 _You_ did. You mattered more than anything to Poe.

But he still couldn’t bring himself to move, and he wished that you would just turn around. He wished you would glance over your shoulder and see him sitting there, and notice how he was looking at you as if you were the brightest star shining overhead, burning just for him — the center of his own little galaxy.

He loved the night sky, too.

**Author's Note:**

> remember to leave a comment or kudos if you enjoyed<3


End file.
